The Three Reasons I Wrote Marriage God’s Way

There are thousands of marriage books, so why another one? Here are the three reasons I wrote Marriage God’s Way!

Marriage God’s Way isn’t about people trusting me

I recognize this isn’t a “reason” I wrote Marriage God’s Way, but it does answer an important question—why should you trust me to write a marriage book? I would never encourage people to trust what I have to say about marriage. Marriage God’s Way isn’t a collection of my thoughts about God’s first institution. Rather, I’m trying to get readers to trust what God says about marriage. He’s the author of it. He designed the roles and responsibilities for husbands and wives. He knows what a couple needs to have “a healthy, joyful, Christ-centered relationship.” And He provided a recipe for that in His Word. My desire was to present that recipe clearly and biblically.

First, I wrote Marriage God’s Way, because I’m passionate about marriage

I’m passionate about this area of Scripture and life. God designed the family as the primary unit for every other segment in society, including the church. And marriage is the heart of the family. As marriages disintegrate, families disintegrates. When families disintegrate, churches disintegrate. As churches disintegrate, society disintegrates.

When marriages are strong, however, families are strong. When families are strong, churches can be strong because strong churches are made up of strong families. As a pastor, I have seen many struggling marriages, but I have also seen couples find the solutions to their problems in Scripture. The truth of God’s Word has the power to heal and strengthen any marriage. Continue reading “The Three Reasons I Wrote Marriage God’s Way”

The mistake we make (that we think we don’t)

There’s a mistake most Christians make, and ironically it’s a mistake we tend to think we don’t makeThe mistake is that we tend to think everything we believe is grounded in Scripture. To be clear, I know for most of our beliefs this is the case, but we also have some beliefs that are shaped more by our backgrounds:

  • The way we were raised
  • The churches we’ve attended
  • The friends we’ve had
  • The books we’ve read

Marriage Gods Way author Scott LaPierre - The mistake we makeEssentially anything that has influenced our lives is going to influence our beliefs. If your background is Baptist, Catholic, Calvary Chapel, Nazarene, home church, Reformed, charismatic, etc. you’re going to have some beliefs that are affected by those experiences. This leads to convictions, preferences, and practices that are different from those with different backgrounds. And generally when people have had strong beliefs for some period of time, they can become more resistant to having those beliefs challenged or changed.

A refreshing conversation

Some time back I noticed a friend had some strong beliefs about something that I didn’t think was unbiblical, but I couldn’t think of any verses in support. I suspected the person might have acquired these convictions from someone the person often quoted. I asked, “Do you think you would feel this way if you never listened to this teacher?”  Continue reading “The mistake we make (that we think we don’t)”

Be Filled with the Spirit – Part IV: It doesn't mean experiencing something emotionally

Be filled with the spirit - Part IVOn Sunday mornings at WCC we’re in the middle of our Marriage & Family Series looking at the instruction for husbands, wives and children in Ephesians 5:22 to 6:4. All the instruction flows from the command in Ephesians 5:18 to, “Not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit.” Considering the importance of this verse I wanted to spend a few weeks talking about what it means…and doesn’t mean.

  • In Part I we saw that it’s not referring to the Holy Spirit indwelling us.
  • In Part II we saw that it doesn’t mean speaking in tongues.
  • In Part III we saw that it doesn’t refer to “being baptized with the Holy Spirit.”

In this post we’ll talk about what else it doesn’t mean: it doesn’t mean experiencing something emotionally.

Jesus is the actual baptizer with the Holy Spirit: John the Baptist said, I indeed baptize you with water…but He who is coming after me…will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire” (Matt 3:11). At Pentecost the people were confused asking, “What does this mean?” (Acts 2:12). Peter explained Jesus ascended to heaven and “poured” out the Holy Spirit: “[Jesus] being exalted to the right hand of God, and having received from the Father the promise of the Holy Spirit, He poured out this which you now see and hear” (Acts 2:33).

Some people believe being “filled with” or “baptized with the Holy Spirit” refers to an emotional or mountaintop experience that takes place at some point in time, or that sort of comes-and-goes throughout the Christian life: you might feel it one day but not the next. This isn’t true and it leads to some serious problems – like most obviously – pursuing something that’s not biblical.

When people’s beliefs are based more on feelings and emotions (than the truth of Scripture), they can be left asking: “Why don’t I feel like I did previously?” When I believed the baptism with the Holy Spirit was an experience taking place after conversion I prayed for it numerous times, had people lay hands on me to receive it, and was left asking, “Was I supposed to feel something? How do I know if I received it? Have I really received it? If not, why not?”

It can lead to discouragement when people feel like they can’t receive something they believe God has for them, and this can be especially painful when people believe they aren’t receiving something God wanted to give to other believers. People are left asking, “Is something wrong with me? Do I not have enough faith?” or even worse questions like, “Does God not love me enough? Maybe I’m not really saved?”

The worst situation  – which took place with a friend of mine – is when people start asking, “Is Christianity real, or is it just made-up stories about people’s supposed experiences?”

The truth is “being filled with the Spirit” is a day-to-day, even moment-by-moment surrendering of our lives to the Spirit, and not something built on experiences and emotions. It’s compared with wine in verse 18, not because it feels like being intoxicated, but because wine has the potential to influence people and so does the Holy Spirit. John MacArthur said, “The filling of the Spirit is not some ecstatic or emotional experience, but a steady controlling of the life by obedience to the truth of God’s Word.”