In Genesis 2:18 God said, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him.” God could’ve created Eve and given her to Adam. Instead, He had Adam name the animals for two reasons:
- Establish Adam’s headship over creation
- Reveal Adam’s lack of a helper
Genesis 2:20 records, “So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.” Adam noticed the animals were in pairs, but he was not part of any pair. With Adam longing for a mate, God was ready to create Eve.
In six days God created dry land, sun, moon, stars, sea creatures, birds, and animals. At the end of each day, “God saw that it was good” (Genesis 1:4, 10, 12, 18, 21, 25). But for the first time during creation He saw something that was not good—man being alone.
God’s statement is even more interesting when we consider that Adam and Eve had not yet sinned. We don’t typically think of anything being “not good” until after the fall. Since Adam had not sinned yet, it was not Adam himself who was not good. Neither was it anything he had or had not done that was not good. It was simply Adam’s being alone that was not good. Here are five reasons why it isn’t good for man to be alone:
1. It is not good for man to be alone, because he won’t have the help he needs
Leading and providing for a family is a lot of work, and a wife can help lighten that load. This is why Paul said, “Man was not created for woman, but woman for the man” (1 Corinthians 11:9). A lot of discouragement can come a husband’s way, and if he does not receive encouragement from his wife, where will he get it? Yes, there are other resources such as Scripture and relying on the Lord, but if that was all God wanted men to have, He would not have said, “I will make him a helper.”
2. It is not good for man to be alone, because he won’t receive the blessing of fulfilling God’s second command
In Genesis 2:18 God said, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it.” Whenever the Bible discusses children they’re always presented very positively. Psalm 127:3-5 says:
Behold, children are a heritage (some translations say “gift”) from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
Blessed is the man who has his quiver full of them;
They shall not be ashamed,
But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.
Psalm 128 contains, “Blessings for Those Who Fear the LORD.” The main blessing is children as verses 1, 3-4 record:
Blessed is every one who fears the Lord,
Who walks in His ways…
Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine
In the very heart of your house,
Your children like olive plants
All around your table.
Behold, thus shall the man be blessed
Who fears the Lord.
It was a sign of God’s blessing when He multiplied children:
- Deuteronomy 7 records the blessings for obedience under the Old Covenant, and verse 13 says: “He will love you and bless you and multiply you; He will also bless the fruit of your womb.”
- The blessings for obedience under the Old Covenant are again repeated in Deuteronomy 28, and verse 4 says, “Blessed shall be the fruit of your body.”
3. It is not good for man to be alone, because he won’t be able to satisfy the desires God has given him
God has given men (and women) healthy, sexual desires (Hebrews 13:4) that He wants satisfied within marriage. The desires for intimacy are emotional, mental, and spiritual. People can have great friends, but they should not take the place of a husband or wife. God wants people to have a companion through life, and part of the reason He created marriage is to see that fulfilled.
4. It is not good for man to be alone, because he won’t have the benefit of a woman’s influence
While it is not always the case, it is common for married men to become gentler and more sensitive. After Katie and I were married, my parents frequently told me how much she influenced me for the better.
5. It is not good for man to be alone, because he won’t experience the sanctification marriage provides
God accomplishes much of the work He wants to do in our lives through marriage. After Scripture and the Holy Spirit, marriage is the greatest way God teaches us forgiveness, sacrifice, patience, dying to self, and the list goes on. When people remain single they can often develop a greater selfishness as they are able to live only for themselves. Once married they should be living for their spouses, and this is wonderfully sanctifying.
Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord”
This is a nice companion verse to Genesis 2:18. When a man receives a wife, he should see her this way. He should understand he is not receiving something neutral or amoral. To illustrate how much of a good thing a wife is, consider God’s observation when He finished creating the heavens and the earth: “Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good. So the evening and the morning were the sixth day” (Genesis 1:31).
A wife takes “not good” and makes it “very good”
This is the end of the sixth day, but earlier in the day, in Genesis 2:18, God observed, “This is not good.” What changed to go from “not good” to “good”? God created a woman. That is how good women are. That is how much of a good thing a wife is:
- When a husband thinks about his wife, he should see her as someone who takes him from “not good” to “very good.”
- When a wife thinks about her husband, she should think about helping him move from “not good” to “very good.”
- Of the five reasons why it is not good for man to be alone, which stood out to you the most? Why?
- How can a wife encourage her husband?
- First Corinthians 11:9 says, “Man was not created for woman, but woman for man.” What application does this have for your marriage?
- How has God taught you forgiveness, sacrifice, patience, and dying to self in your marriage?
- How can a wife treat her husband so that he sees her as a “good thing” and as “favor from the Lord?”