Have you ever heard, “You can be right and still be wrong”? There’s an example in this week’s sermon, and recently I faced a situation where it applied. Here’s a little background info: a relative of mine (who isn’t a believer, but thinks she’s a good person who’s going to go to heaven…like most unbelievers) was caught in a lie she told about Katie. I confronted her about the lie. This left her with the two options we face when confronted with lying: admit it or deny it which usually involves telling more lies to cover up the original lie (and this is what happened with her).
Here’s where the quote comes in! My desire: confront her about the other lies (aka keep the tension in our family going). We (my parents, Katie and I) had a family meeting. It’s obvious to everyone she’s lying, but everyone wants to let it go…except me…because of my flesh and because I’m immature. I could confront her AGAIN and be right in what I say…but be wrong because I know the right thing to do is let it go. Here’s the conversation I had with Katie (with my notes in parentheses):
Me – She’s caused a number of problems in our family over the years and there’s no sign of it stopping any time soon, so this should be addressed.
Katie – Things are already tense between them (her and her husband) and you (true). She’s obviously not going to confess; confronting her again is just going to push her further away and decrease the chances of us witnessing to them.
Me – People don’t get saved until they know they’re terrible, wretched sinners who need forgiveness through Christ, so let’s help her see that…I mean that’s basically how I got saved.
Katie – She’s not you. That’s just going to push them further away. You need to love them, so they can see the love of Christ through you and see how He changed your life.
Me – That won’t help her see her sinfulness and need for Christ.
Katie – This is exactly what you did with your parents (true) that made them want to move to Texas to get away from you (true).
Me – Uhhh…umm…well…
Katie – It wasn’t until you backed off and started loving your parents and being gentle toward them that they came to salvation.
Me – Is it already 10:00?